Menacing Society #4: Pet Peeves

I've been putting off this post for a while because I knew once I posted it, I'd come up with a million more things to add to the post.  But it's high time I write another post in this blog series, and there's only 2 subjects I have left to cover.  I may list more pet peeves in another post later, so don't think this is a comprehensive list:

• Being set up on a blind date, "because well, you're single, and she's single..."  I don't mind blind dates, and I certainly hope everyone you set me up with is also single.  But if that's all we have in common, please don't waste my time.  You'd be surprised how often I hear that phrase.  On a side note, it's also a pet peeve to be set up on a blind date with someone you think I need to learn major lessons from.
• Having to explain what I'm looking for.  I don't know anyone who has a specific list of requirements in a future spouse.  Yes, I can probably name a few things that are important to me - testimony, physical attraction - but I always end up finding myself struggling to give them an adequate answer.  It's as frustrating as trying to describe the taste of salt to someone who's never tasted it.
• The jealous and snide comments people make about how I spend my money.  Believe me, I'd rather be broke if it meant I was using my money to take care of a wife and kids.  But I've got savings, and I no longer think I should punish myself for not having found "the one" yet.  So I reserve the right to go on cool vacations, buy cool toys, etc.
• Talking about my marital status at someone else's wedding.  It's usually always accompanied with some form of "don't worry, you'll find her."  The conversation is usually anything but comforting and, depending on my recent dating misadventures, just rubs salt in an open wound.  And there comes a point when you become too old to participate in the boquet/garter toss.  I'm here to support the bride and groom, see family/friends, and have a piece of cake.  There's a reason I'm keeping a low profile, so can we NOT turn the focus on me?
• Why is my dating life the only thing people want to talk about?  I don't want people living vicariously through my love life.  Most singles have pretty exciting lives - more frequent vacations, school, stories at work, etc.  By the time I tell you about all my news in those departments, I've told you more about my life than you've told me about yours.  Additionally, I feel like my life is exceptionally exciting - I'm frequently involved in a performance or two, I'm heavily involved with church, I find frequent volunteer opportunities, and I'm in an improv comedy troupe!  I feel like I live out of my car more than my apartment.  Apparently I'm the only one who thinks all that is conversation-worthy, though, since married people don't take much interest in those things at all.
• Assumption of fault.  I covered this one pretty well in a previous post.  Just because I'm single, doesn't mean there's something so wrong with me that I can't find someone to marry.  Yet I'm constantly bombarded with questions such as, "Why don't you want to get married?"
• Prying questions about one's current relationship.  I know you're only asking how serious we are so that you can try to predict when you might hear wedding bells.  It's none of your business whether or not we've used the "L word."  I understand many people just want to see us happy, and are looking for confirmation, but how awkward are those questions when the relationship isn't going well?  The bottom line: please stay out of our relationship - three's company.
• Advice.  When it comes to dating, everyone suddenly becomes Dr. Phil.  Since when are you the expert at dating?  I recognize that you found a successful relationship, but who's to say your circumstances are like mine?  Even well-intended advice can turn a good dating situation sour - I've seen it happen.  I'm not you - different things make me happy, I handle situations differently, different people are going to attract me, and different issues are important.  It's not that I don't value what you may want to say to me.  It's just that my world isn't the same as your world.  If I want your advice, I'll ask for it.  And if red flags do come up, I'm much more likely to listen to you if you've respected the privacy of my relationship otherwise.
• How married/engaged people seem to forget overnight what it's like to be single.  I know I'm not alone in these pet peeves - in fact, most of my peers feel EXACTLY the same way.  Yet, I've known newlyweds of less than a year that violate almost every one of these pet peeves.  It's like there's a veil of forgetfulness that they pass through between their single life and their married life.  And don't give me any cheek about some "awakening" that changes their mind about all these issues - if they truly remember what it's like being single, they would also remember the effect these things have on singles.

Another thing that bothers most singles my age (it's not a personal pet peeve of mine, but seemed appropriate to post here) is how people in the church treat singles.  They talk about the singles ward as if it's the Island of Misfit Toys.  Nobody wants them, and there's something wrong with each one.  They just don't fit in, so let's send them somewhere that they don't bother us.  I've had friends express frustration about how they don't feel welcome in family wards.  There's a huge chunk of singles who fall away from the church; there's no need to put undue pressure on them to fit in.  Why is it that so many people feel like there's no spot for singles in the church, when we preach that 2 out of 3 degrees of the Celestial Kingdom are for them?  Just an observation...

Okay, for all you single people: what are some pet peeves of yours that I didn't put on the list?  For you married people: I know not all of you are guilty of these things.  And for those who have a differing opinion, I'm happy to hear your reasoning.  :-)